June 8, 2018June 19, 2018 by administrator

Pepe the Frog, meet Ivan, the Testicle

And now, for something completely different… demonological cartooning.

In order to bring the alt-righters a better sense of historical accuracy in their mascots, I introduce “Ivan the Testicle” ; he’s a hyper-masculine advocate for Russian interests with a fur hat and baskets for shoes . As a lapotnik, he is not only backwards and uneducated; but he also literally makes lapti for a living. An evil personification of the enslavement of the Russian people by their leaders’ manipulations of nationalist mythology and religion for political purposes.

Character Bio

Name: Ivan the Testicle
Age: 471
Origin: Ivan IV’s magically swollen testicle, preserved in vodka and bathhouse slime
Ethnicity: Russian
Occupation: Lapotnik
Hobbies: Drinking
Politics: Nationalist and Conspiracy Theorist
Religion: Orthodox Antisemite